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Overflowing Cup {Episode 25}

emotions mindset motherhood Sep 07, 2023
full cup of water

We've all heard that we have to have our cups filled in order to give to others (and not lose our minds in the process), but what does having a full cup actually look like? And how do we get there when our plates are way too full?

In this episode I'll teach you how to identify what areas of self-care you tend to neglect, how to find more peace in our lives and what a "balanced" life even looks like.

Learn more about Leah Davidson and nervous system regulation

If you've been a mom for more than 5 seconds, you understand how easy it is to fell tapped out, overwhelmed and like your cup is going on empty.

We're biologically hard wired to care for the young even at the expense of our own health and sanity. If you're a mompreneur, then this is even more important!

Adding obligations to your life means that there are more demands on your time, brain and emotions and you need to keep yourself charged.

For just a second, let's go to that place where we're running on low battery mode. What do we eliminate? Usually anything unnecessary: we eliminate friend time, relaxing downtime (or we do nothing but that), no creative pursuits, no goal setting or pushing ourselves.

We do not want to live in survival! It will be nearly impossible to be a great mom and even more impossible to build an incredible business.

So I want you to do a little exercise when you get a chance and aren't listening in the car. Make a list of every area of your life that you want to be healthy (I just did this and it was so eye opening). It should be at least 4 areas but no more than 10. Things like physical health, spirituality, relationships, business, family. etc. Then, next to each one, rate the current health of this area on a scale from 1-10. Are your eyes opened a little bit?

Do you notice any trends? Anything alarming? Anything you're proud of? The trend I noticed was how any area that didn't feel productive, got neglected: friends and extended family, relaxation, play.

This is a fantastic exercise to do anytime you're feeling out of balance or like something is missing. Lots of women tend to fear that success or entrepreneurship will change this about them. But just having this insight will keep that from happening! You know what kind of business you want to build.

So what do we do if we're regularly feeling like our cup (or battery) is running low? Sometimes looking at that list of areas we don't want to neglect can seem impossible! We start with whatever gets us back into peace.

There are a lot of things that energize me and some that slow me down, but there are very specific activities that bring me peace and calm. It usually looks like something physically relaxing: hammock, rocking chair, leisurely walk, bike ride.

For me it also looks like no stimulus or something very soothing like calm music, or a meditation track. Yours might be different but we have to learn how to reset our nervous system intentionally so that we have the bandwidth to create this amazing business.

Let's talk about the analogy of the full cup for a second (I love visualizations). We're not filling our cup and letting it get emptied over and over by life's obligations. We're keeping it full and sharing the overflow with the world. It does you no good to constantly be running on near empty.

This is a very intentional practice. I'm an introvert who needs quiet alone time. I also live with 11 people, the majority of whom I homeschool and never leave the house. It's a full time job trying to figure out how to show up as an amazing and patient mom, a creative businesswoman and a loving wife, without losing my mind.

Ensuring you are healthy and happy is priority number one, but catering to your family, loved one's and even acquaintances' whims is not. You need to be very intentional about what's essential and what is not.

So let's talk about what this looks like on a daily or weekly basis. This might not be fun to hear if you're a box checker, but you're not gonna likely get to all those priorities we listed before on a daily basis. I don't even get to them on a weekly basis!

But this is a very personal thing. I personally think that they all belong in your life at least monthly. Here's an example that's worked for me:

Daily: eating healthy, sleeping well, some work, scriptures and prayer, some relaxation (book), family time.

Weekly: several times to exercise, seeing friends (usually in passing), a little more relaxation, working on home, church service.

Monthly: more in-depth friend time, deeper home or work project, time away with husband or friends, worshipping in our temples.

Your habits create your destiny and what you neglect, will die. But likewise, run yourself too ragged and you burn out. Keep your daily things to the very most essential, and find time to work in the others throughout the week or month.

This is your permission to create the life you want, but do so intentionally and remember that your life doesn't exist without YOU so make sure you are the first priority.

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